To report every instance of idiocy, ineptitude and blowhardiness in Hollywood would take a team of several thousand bloggers working 20-hour days. This is not news. The group assigned to the Kardashians would break the Internet alone with its output. Nevertheless, as a world-class cynic, I would be remiss if I did not point out the most egregious offenders to the public’s sensibilities.

1.) Movie trailers. A movie trailer is like a 30-second reminder of how little movie studios think of their audiences. Some of the tricks they employ are tried-and-true: using a classic song to grab our attention (Sweet Home Alabama is a 382-time offender), overselling the role of a major star in the movie (i.e., if the actor has but a cameo appearance, they’ll feature him as the main character), using snippets of the sexiest scenes to titillate. Some of the more irritating recent developments have been the lack of any dialogue for foreign films — can’t scare the public off with those accents! — and dizzyingly fast cuts that have reached the point of absurdity (I became a little nauseous with those incessant Wolf of Wall Street trailers). Perhaps the most overused device is the night vision shots of audiences watching a preview of a soon-to-be-released horror movie. Witnessing shrieking moviegoers bathed in green light is effective the first time, notsomuch by the 27th. Enough. Look, I know the competition for the moviegoer’s dollar is fiercer than ever. But if a movie is good enough on its own merits, a straight-up trailer sans gimmickry should suffice. Wait, what’s that? Almost everything that’s released is schlock?!

2.) “I performed all my own stunts on this film.” This is a perfect example of the aforementioned blowhardiness. On exactly what level does an actor think we care that it’s actually him/her jumping onto a flatbed truck from a moving vehicle? If they think that it lends an air of authenticity to the film, great. But most people go to the movies to escape reality for a couple hours, isn’t this point rendered moot? It also seems that some actors do their own stunts in some misguided attempt to show how invested they are in their “craft.” Still others do it probably because it looks like fun. In the case of Tom Cruise, I think all three reasons apply. And, I guess it could be argued that, for the millions they’re making, Tom, Jason Statham, Gerard Butler and co. should be rolling with the pulled punches.

3.) The mid-season finale. This is a relatively new phenomenon, as some networks have taken to breaking up the seasons of some shows into two chunks — two examples are AMC’s The Walking Dead and ABC’s Revenge. They give the show a break for a few weeks or even a couple months, for varied reasons- sometimes it’s pre-empted for the Olympics, sometimes to take advantage of sweeps periods. On one level, whatever strategery network execs want to use these days to maximize viewers is fair game; the fight for viewers is a bitter one. But the term “mid-season finale” seems like a desperate attempt to trump up viewership for what is, in essence, a non-event. Of course, there is the obvious point that the term is a misnomer. Then again, rationality has never been the strong suit of network execs…

Just missed the cut: The continued existence of every single fucking reality show; too much CGI; Alan Thicke.